Reel life Effect on Real Life

I spent my weekend in the second most common place I am found now a days …. My office cubicle … the first place being the part of my home with my laptop, THE plastic chair and the dining table..

I being in office this weekend … though dreadfully pathetic … made it totally different from the previous one …. Which was totally invested in watching movies … ranging from as mild as P.S. I love you …. To as homely as Hum Saath Saath hain … to as scary as Final destination and Exorcism of Emily rose…. To as brain twisters as fight club and shutter island …… to as old as heer ranjha and mother India…

OK I didn’t complete these all in one weekend …. I was just trying to make the plot for the write-up ….

The point is … this weekend, me not watching movies and T.V. series like prison break, friends, etc. And me enjoying the company of myself in the deserted office, gave me the opportunity to analyze these great work of art which I have interestingly memorized in recent past … and the results were so vivid and out of the ordinary that it led to the hours long discussion with my friends ….

There are many many scenarios which are injected in our lives just because of the reel life we enjoy via T.V. series and movies. Scenarios which we don’t think on much and accept it as a part of our lives, but which are actually induced deep within us and are penetrated to such a level of depth that we think that these scenarios are actually real.This weekend … in office…. I jotted down some such scenarios which are of Reel life but I experience them as part of the actual Real life.


Scenario 1 and the best which I like to discuss:


My dad (popularly known as “bapu”) one day got an attack of nostalgic…. and I was the victim of the same….. he told me the things he use to enjoy doing when he was of my age … this topic, before it was under discussion, always seem to be the most boring of all …. But was actually interesting…. I heard the way they use to go college … the girls around (now aunties :D) … the things bapu and his gang use to do just to pass their bunked-class time … their hang out spots …. And many such things….

In the course of this discussion, something struck my mind like a head on accident with a truck…. I was listening to bapu and trying to imagine the places and the time he was talking about…. And all of a sudden I realized that all I was imagining was in black and white…. NO COLOUR AT ALL…. This thought forced me to leave my bapu talking to himself in a trance state and think on this very nature of mine…. why I am imagining everything related to my bapu’s time in black and white…. I mean sure there would have been as many colours as I see right now…. if he is saying “our professor use to wear a brown trouser with checks and seeing that we use to laugh so hard that our faces use to turn red” … why can’t I imagine that trouser as brown and bapu’s face as red … why it is all black, grey and white … the white is not even white I know … its pale …. Why it’s so ….

The answer was quite easy if you give this question a thought … It’s because the all the visual proofs of my bapu’s time I have are in Black and white … the photographs and more important … THE MOVIES….. BollyWood is so complexly woven into my mind that it has forced to believe that the old times were actually colourless….

To add to this theory … when I was discussing this with my colleague … YES we discuss this in the office in presence of all the people…. now you may know why I am seen as a psychopath in office … the colleague, matching my frequency, told…. His father once discussed about his schooling….. His school was behind the temple near their house…. now my colleague has visited that place…. That house and has seen the temple…. in his own life with the original colours…. But interpreting the scene into a virtual picture … the mind refuses to accept colours. Tough my logical mind knows it not true and the days back then were as colourful as it is today…. But the Reel impacted brain refuses the same … this is the impact of BollyWood on us.


Scenario 2 which I love to call “face for MYTHOLOGY”:


The other day …. My sis in jaipur …. The rarest combination of talent and confusion called me up … the topic of discussion was … “the dream I had last night” … yes …. This was the topic over the elongated STD phone call ….

She said … I had a dream where I saw Lord Shree ram …. To this I idiotically said “ ok so you saw Arun Govil” … after a few second pause she said … actually yes …. She was trying to recall the dream and the part where Lord Shree ram appeared… She couldn’t imagine anybody but Arun Govil dressed the way he used to dress in Ramanand Sagar’s Ramayan …. We two were so fascinated by this fact … we have given a face to our God and Goddesses … and this assignment is purely driven by the mythological T.V. series we have been watching since we know about this earth. Now when we think of Lord Ram, we automatically assign the face of Mr. Govil to him … vice versa id not true …. You whenever see Mr. Govil in some normal attire; you won’t always picture him as lord ram …. But as soon as you imagine lord ram you will definitely portrait the image of Mr. Govil. At least I do it.

Adding to this habit of ours.. or I rather say mine… I was always been notorious in the family as the guy pulling his cousins’ and nephews’ leg and teasing them to cry … My paternal Uncle use to call me “shakuni mama” depicting my evil side towards my nephew :) … and I use to imagine …. Do by any chance I look like …. Or I will look like … Gufi Paintal when I will grow old …. I didn’t even know that his real name was Gufi Paintal before I started writing this post …. For me he was just shakuni mama … and I can’t imagine more wicked mama than him …. I just loved to address my nephew in the typical accent “BHAAANJE”

Same is the case with the most handsome villain of all time… Duryodhana …. How can someone imagine Duryodhana anyone else than the great Puneet Issar …. No one can’t fit into the head when someone says “as evil as Duryodhana” other than the dude Mr. Issar …. Yet another face to mythology….

The point is …. Just give a thought on the thought that what percentage of your life lives in the Reel world believing into a delusion that it’s the Real World ;)

My Response to the mail by Gopi Ram to Chetan Bhagat

Came across a post on facebook which was to THE Chetan Bhagat (who so ever needs introduction to this name should leave reading this post coz he/she is not worth it) …. It was kind of an attempt (a gross one rather) to oppose to what Mr. Bhagat said for THE Narayan Murthy few days ago …. Here is the link… read it... will give you the reason of this post

https://www.facebook.com/notes/gopi-ram/a-letter-to-chetan-bhagat-/228517470538128

As it was hell of a time since I commented on something in the most granular manner … so thought of doing the same on this post by Mr. Gopi Ram (don’t ask me who he is) …. And with all due respect Mr. Ram …. Any of my following comments are not against you or opposing you …. The reason being … Your post has forced me to read it completely and thoroughly and has forced me to comment on the same... that’s impressive....:D

So on the post by Mr. Gopi Ram which I love to call … THE QUEST TO BE GROSSLY FAMOUS …… here are my comments...
Before committing... Please do bare the following 4 paragraphs discussing about my point of view on this Bhagat-Murthy word-war….. Consider this as the plot for the complete write-up

First of all …. People all round the nation just are screaming their brains out that “how Mr. Bhagat say Infosys as body shopping company”... This itself proved Mr. Bhagat’s point …. What he meant to say (as I understood by his interview) was … The choice of words many times kills the total essence and logic of the message delivered … Mr. Bhagat’s Idea behind his reaction might be something like.... We should not hire professionals just to fill the seats in U.S. and earn dollars but to hire them to generate jobs FOR India and not FROM India FOR US …

Now as soon as I say this the people knowing me will shoot the question … “ok so you won’t go to US right??” with sarcastic smiles on their faces …. Well my answer is of course I will go to US if got a chance … why … to get the actual price of what I am delivering... because the Information Technology Industry system itself is so hypocrite that an I.T. guy with some years of experience is given work twice as that of his experience but when it comes to money …. You in fraction of second become “dude with less experience”

It’s the initial steps taken to form Indian I.T. Industry which were disaster...
Now coming back to the topic… Mr. Bhagat’s would have said what he intended in a non-pin-pointing manner, like if He would have said …. “Mr. Murthy being one of the pioneers of Indian I.T. industry can now improve the system of just creating Employment FROM India FOR US into creating Employment FOR India … this statement would have been a total non-controversial one ….. But he deliberately chooses a phrase which shouldn’t be said for a great man as Mr. Murthy …. Only to prove that how the intent behind his message was flushed because of the words he chooses.

Same way … Mr. Murthy though might have no intent of saying anything bad about the IIT students … he might wanted to point out the coaching class trend and the other foul things in the education system right now …. But the choice of his words “quality of the IIT students has deteriorated” seem to be pin pointing the soft target “the students” which lead to his whole intent of the message flushed …..
THUS …. The agitation of many people like Mr. Gopi Ram has all together proved Mr. Bhagat’s point even more clearly.

Now I would like to reply on the well written cheap shots Mr. Ram has played against Mr. Bhagat ….. Because of 2 reasons …. First is yes I am a Chetan Bhagat fan …. And second … its 2:00 AM and I am not able to sleep …. So this act may create some peace in my head...

MY COMMENTS on the allegation of “not discussing anything about IIT” by Mr. GOPI RAM:

You said in the first few lines that why Chetan Bhagat never discusses about the knowledge he gained in IIT and IIM in public statements ….

• Why should he? He shares with people the talent he is gifted with and the hard work he has put to polish the same …. And it is HIS WRITING …. And if you have an opinion that WRITING is not a talent or knowledge to be proud of in front of engineering and Finance …. Well what can I say to a highly immature guy like you who considered such a divine and powerful gift of WRITING as nothing

• Also 2 times you tried to pin point that 5 point someone had nothing about IIT … how to study in IIT … there was nothing about the technical stuff ….. DUDE … it was supposed to be like that …. The title said “what NOT to do in IIT”... And the same is clearly stated as the opening lines on page 1 of the novel ….. Hope you have read the novel before committing on the same ….. The novel was a pure act of fiction …. It was an excellent write up to give you a relaxed ride into a fictional story of 3 friends and their college life … it’s the GUYS like you mix this excellent work of fiction with reality …. Who just hear the word IIT and can’t think anything other than Technical stuff….. Don’t worry ... WE think just same as most of the mediocre people think …. But WE don’t have any stand to question on the knowledge and talent of a person with such a mammoth stature.

MY COMMENTS ON the lame “Bhagat-Aamir” comparison by Mr. GOPI RAM:



I have 5 very specific points to tell for this part of the post

• What’s up with this “yo” … its “YOU” … DUDE …..

• You said that if Amir khan’s characters was depicting Mr. Bhagat and if he would have become a writer and all then the movie would be a disaster …. Now I can’t stop laughing …. Aamir khan’s character was not of that of Chetan Bhagat’s i.e. HARI in “five point someone” ….. The character HARI was never a leader as rancho in the movie …. In the novel it was Ryan ….. The character of Aamir khan was never supposed to be that of Hari …. It cannot be as they are not at all related …. Alas … you my friend ….. Gopi Ram …. Only watch the movie and read the novels … like other mediocre people do …. But don’t study them ….

• You said that Mr. Bhagat should “Stop judging and blaming and try to fix the problems” …. Well my friend … Mr. Bhagat never blames anybody in his novels … He point out what he things going wrong so that people can think on it …. Which He can do in his jurisdiction …. What you think Mr. Bhagat is … SHAKTIMAN … who has the responsibility to fix whatever is wrong …. He too is a normal human being dude …. But he has the gift of writing miracles and he uses the same to max of his ability to do what can be done to remove evils from the society …. Alas you didn’t understand this even after he published 4 great novels ….. Hope you understand this in the fifth and the latest one…..

• And By the way … this gift of Mr. Bhagat to create magic out of the words should NOT be said as “sophisticated writing skills and metaphors” … it sounds as if you are saying that the guy is a show off …. Remember my friend… Show off is what guys like me do when I write …. Not THE Chetan Bhagat.

• Also when you compared Chetan Bhagat with the character “Suhas” in the movie 3 idiots …. It sound like what Mr. Bhagat did … i.e. first going into IIT and then into IIM …. Is something not good … or is lame … or is stupidity …. Well most of the people want to see the side comfortable to them think that... I will give you an example

• If my aim is to be an engineer …. And the ultimate goal is to get into one of the most reputed engineering company …. What my background should be as decided by the education system of India … I should be qualified in some way or the other in mathematics, physics or chemistry … then I should prepare for an engineering test to get into some great college like IIT ….. I can get into the respective engineering fields and get the best company if I work hard …. Fair ENOUGH straight route ….. BUT here also people do take up the initial course say as chemistry and land up writing some computer code in some I.T. industry … but you won’t say those people stupid as they fall into your comfort zone. Ok leave such people …

• Now if my aim is to be a banker …. And my ultimate goal is to working in one of the most biggest financing companies in the world … What my background should be as decided by the education system of India … if I take up the fair ENOUGH straight route and do a BBA and then apply for C.A.T. .. Work hard as hell and get into IIM …. I am into IIM and I have followed the path which starts and ends to what I want …. Then why when getting selected for companies, I am being considered as low priority that the students who did engineering and then came to IIMs.

• My point it the route for an administrative job laid by the Education System of India is not as straight as that of engineering job …. If one has to fulfil his dream to be at the top in Finance … he has to go through engineering to prove his worth.

• So before criticizing Mr. Bhagat on the path he chooses to do first IIT and then IIM …. Consider that he had that only path to follow to attain excellence … and appreciate the guy that he proved every time that he has an upper hand and he is not a fluke by cracking 2 most prestigious institutions in India.

MY COMMENTS ON the Final and the most ridiculous part of the post by Mr. GOPI RAM :

• I guess I have answered to your anger on Mr. Bhagat using “body shopping” word for Mr. Murthy and your concerns of Mr. Bhagat not doing anything for the society earlier in this pot of mine (if you understood the whole thing).

• Till the time I reached the end of your post Mr. RAM …. I was so impressed … but this last part disappointed me …. You all together didn’t understand Mr. Bhagat’s comments at the first place …. He never meant to say that Mr. Murthy didn’t have the right to say about IIT …. He said that Mr. Murthy has NO RIGHT to say BAD about IIT student considering the very fact that many of those students consider Mr. Murthy as their role model …. Mr. Murthy should have known that how depressing this might sound to the students who work hard but at the end hear this from their very own role model. Why Mr. Murthy had to target the student who are at such a juncture of their lives where such a statement from him can result into very serious consequences …. Being one of the highest employment creators of the country … as you said Mr. RAM …. Shouldn’t Mr. Murthy act a bit responsibly while making public statements … knowing very well the fact that his statements are being memorized like Gita by my students. And if the Director of IIT did say with the same use of the words as that of Mr. Murthy … then of course he too is absolutely wrong … he is the director of IIT and not the creator of this world … I can be wrong….

• Also Mr. Gopi Ram ….. I was surprised when you compared Mr. Murthy and Mr. Bhagat … you said Mr. Murthy created employment and Mr. Bhagat didn’t …. LOLzzzz …. Dude these two personalities are working into different genre of fields and both did at the best of their capabilities … its lame to even compare them …. So there is no point of who can speak about IIT and who cannot … both are the gems of IIT and IIT belongs to both of them and they both belong to IIT.

• Sorry to say this … but it was very cheap on your part Mr. Gopi Ram when you said that Narayan murthy could have published his love story and he would have been more successful than Chetan Bhagat but he didn’t want to do such a below the dignity act.

• You saying that what Mr. Bhagat writes is below dignity …. Hell no Ram … somebody thinks that way … He is cheap and not Mr. Bhagat.

• Mr. Bhagat didn’t sell his love story …. He wrote fictional love stories … one of the best stories you can ever read …. And he wrote with such a passion, dedication, purity and honesty that you believed that it’s his love story…. Coz I can’t believe that a guy can have 4 awesome but totally different version of his own love story …. As explained in his 4 different books …. GROW UP and appreciate the ability of this writer to forget the reality while reading his work. This criticism you are doing of Mr. Bhagat actually is appreciating his spectacular ability to make the readers believe his fiction as real.

• And as a matter of fact …. Mr. Murthy’s story would have been a successful book only if it would have been written by a writer as good as Mr. Bhagat …. One of the basic ingredients to write a awesome story is the presentation and I hope you will agree that Mr. Bhagat is awesome in presentation….. So again comparing the fictional stories of Mr. Bhagat with the true love story of Mr. Murthy and discussing on which one is better is gross and is also an insult even to Mr. Murthy.

As the final words for this almost 5 page post :D , I won’t say you to stop writing comments or won’t say you dumb as you said to Mr. Bhagat … I am dumber than you coz I started writing this post at 2:00 AM and completed the same at 4:00 AM….. Wrote for 2 hours... Sacrificed my good night sleep.
Hope to see more write-ups from you and hope that our friendship will grow better and better Mr. GOPI RAM.

See you.
Bhavik Sharma.

My tribute to Myself - THE MAN

Was getting frustrated in office .... as usual .... and all of a sudden a mail popped on my screen ..... 

Again I am sorry from deviating from the topic .... But I was thinking, its so stupid ... this statement ... "all of a sudden a mail popped on my screen" ... a stupid lame attempt to add up the excitement ... and I know for sure that the attempt is flushed ..... "all of a sudden" .... Its was just a mail, not a ghost for God's sake .... grow up Bhavik .....

Anyways, now when I have scolded my self .... starting with the main topic of discussion .... I got an over-feminine-biased mail from a friend (who is a girl of course) …. It was containing an article by the MASTER of words saying that as per a survey by I-don’t-know-who, Indian Women are the most stressed out in the world … there are some stats as well ….


Please read the original article first …. It will give some spice to my write up ;)

The ORIGINAL ARTICLE

Article on Indian Women - By the Master of words

link2 : http://www.facebook.com/note.php?note_id=224790214226537

THE RESPONSE

I Repeat ….. Please read the original article first …. It will give some spice to this write up ;)

I was quite stressed out myself while reading the mail ...

As soon as I completed reading the article, just thought ..... its been 2.5 years since I am using Microsoft outlook software on my office computer, and I cant even count the number of mail I have received which projects females as the most frustrated, hard-working, pressurized, simple, loving, caring, mature creatures on this mother earth ..... see ... the very earth we live in is said "Mother earth" ... it would sound crazy to call the same Father Earth ... 

I initiated a comparison, within myself, between the quantity of such girl-supportive, women-oriented mails with the quantity of mails which have shown that even men are facing troubles, are pressurized, are frustrated, are simple, are happy-go-lucky, are honest, are cheated and even are harassed.... 

As our school math book says ..... The count being very close to zero (the later in this case) can be neglected.....

As I said, I was already tired and frustrated prior reading this mail and after this mail, I was tired of being frustrated ...... And at that very point of time, the insane better half of my brain started working and what came out as a by-product was my response, what I would write if anytime in my life, my write ups are even 10% of what the Great Writer Mr. Bhagat writes.  

So ladies and gentleman ... enjoy yet another bizarre fantasy on the flow:

Bhavik Sharma’s recent Article in …. Well actually not published anywhere … the Article is in THIS BLOG: Specially for Indian MEN. Do Read it and share it with all the men in your life (this sentence means that share it with all the MEN you know, don’t run your brains in any other direction)

Alright, this is not cool at all. A recent survey by Bhavik Sharma (seeing the MEN around him) has revealed that Indian MEN are the most stressed out in the world: I-don’t-know-how-much % of our men feel stressed out most of the time. This statistic has not made me stressed out coz I am already in that I-don’t-know-how-much percentage.

What are we doing with our MEN? I’m biased, but Indian men are the most intelligent, smart and STUD in the world. As fathers, brothers, sons, colleagues, husbands and boyfriends – women love them. Can you imagine life without the MEN?

For now, I want to give Indian men five suggestions to reduce their stress levels.

• One, don’t ever think you are without power when you are with your girlfriend. Give it back to her. Be who you are, not someone she wished you would be. She doesn't like you? That's her problem.

• Two, if you are doing a good job at work and your boss doesn’t value you - DON’T tell him that. Make him realize the same. Go for tea breaks every hour and that too for 30 minutes, give the estimated time to do a 5 minute job as 2 days, yawn in middle of the meeting, don’t take bath for weeks, don’t brush your teeth for months, come to office at 3:00 PM ... that too drunk ... leave at 6:00 PM ... get some more alcohol .... And then return at 7:00 PM to attend client calls. If the BOSS still doesn’t get it, then tell him and quit. Talented, hard-working people without the above mentioned habits are much in demand.

• Three, educate yourself on the topic of "latest pubs in town" and "night restaurants", learn skills to make your salary account reach Zero by last week of the month and live your life for the last week on loans, network - figure out ways to be economically bankrupt. So next time your wife tells you that you are not a good enough husband, father or son-in-law, you can show your bank statement and let her realize that she still has a good life even when you have nothing.

• Four, do not ever feel stressed about having a dual responsibility of family and work. Accept that you SUCK at both the places. It’s a trick called "self humiliation". Though you might be good in all the areas, but people will always expect more and will make you believe that you are not doing good enough. So project yourself as a loser and you will be given the grade of expert even if you do just fine, and it would eventually result in immense pleasure and satisfaction. And if you can’t follow this "self humiliation" mantra, then believe in one thing, it is okay if you are considered as human excreta by all, but remember, they all know in what all areas you are awesome and all these stupid women will come to you on their knees when they need you, and then you can have that "revenge" time. And at that very moment ... well use your imagination and do what all you wanted to do with such people. BE THE DEVIL.

• Five, most important, don't get competitive with other men. Come on guys, that person is as frustrated as you. Educate him the above four point and help him come out his frustration. Compete with him if he is of some other sexual orientation, coz these all points are designed for STRAIGHT men. He doesn’t fall under this umbrella, so compete with him and WIN (but if you don’t, go through this write up again and be happy, it’s ok to get a defeat from such people, just don’t discuss it, keep it with yourself).
  
  • Don't be jealous of men of your kind.... what if a normal person like you is performing better, if he is having a good car, if he is having a better salary, if he is getting an awesome hike all the time,
    WELL ...
  • Give our work to him as he performs better,
  • Always come to office in his good car and let him pay the petrol fare as a fees of having a good car,
  • Always take him with you on lunch, dinner, tea stalls, smoke zones and always pretend that you forgot your wallet or you forgot to withdraw money from ATM, 
  • Always force him to throw a party for his good hike and eat the most expensive food and drink the most expensive and exotic alcohol.

So breathe, chill, and relax. Tell yourself you are a HUNK, do your best and deserve a peaceful life. Anybody trying to take that away from you is making a mistake, not you. Your purpose of coming to this earth is not to please everyone. Your purpose is to follow your own crazy way, without hurting others, and have a good life in return. The next time I do a survey like this, I don't want to see Indian men on top of the list. I want them to be the happiest men in the world. Now smile, before your wife/GF/or any other girl shouts at you for wasting your time reading this crap.

REMEMBER ...... You are not the ideal man, but you can follow the above 5 points and live life KING SIZE :D

Cherish THE MACHO.

Love @ FaceBook

Most of the people ... or I must precisely say .... almost all the people would first have a wide eye look and following the same would laugh their heart out hearing this .... I have been writing since a year.... Poems....

Well I am sure I SUCK at it ... well it’s not true ... I was being humble and down to earth.... Fact is I do write good poems ... at least me, my ammee, my bapu and my laptop think that way (laptop is included just to increase the number of appreciator, don't use much of your brains analyzing the inclusion) ....

Was getting bored writing about the darker side of life one day.... I was experiencing some rare feelings like Relaxation, happiness and fun ... Was publishing everything positive and happy thoughts FaceBook ... which is rare as well.... 

Just then thought, I am online on FB almost 24 hours through different modes like laptop, cell phone and all ... I post a status update so frequently that my friends have suggested me to post even when I use washroom (for any purpose) .... And the best thing which me and many of the people I know do on FaceBook is... Profile visiting ... mostly of the females....

We share some sessions of highly philosophical discussions, just considering the fact that there is a girl at the receiving end.... and she is ready to receive what all you talk.... which is rare in real world....

So thought of writing something on this tendency of we people who are addicted to FB like HELL..... Then thought of giving my work a touch of Futility ... so recorded the literature to give it my voice and a life :D

So Ladies and Gentlemen ..... Enjoy my thinking regarding ....  "Love on FaceBook"

PS:

 Its a 7 minute poem.... once started, listening the complete work with complete attention is a compulsion ... or else you would get screwed with a Shitty partner ... that too via FaceBook ... It’s a curse attached with the same :D :D :D

Delta At Horizon

There are times when you have a tsunami of thoughts drowning each and every part of your brain and you just search valve to open and let all the thoughts be poured to the outside world ..... but you dont get people who are brave enough to stand each and every wave created in your head .....

If you have never experienced such a thing in your life ..... Well its officially proved .. .you are normal .... and you have a stable stage of mind ..... but I experience it even when I am sleeping ...

 never met a person who is ready to hear and bear all what I say .... once I met one .... after 6 months of atrocity, she is now happily married to someone else .....

Came across this BLOG thing ..... you know what is the best part of it .... its MY BLOG .... no one can restrict me to write anything here ..... Except Eric Schmidt, Larry Page, and Sergey Brin and their team of course ;)

Was in a Dilemma to decide the FIRST POST for the blog ….. Then thought what can be better than the thing which I have Dreamed for almost my whole life …..

So Here it goes ….

13 odd guys and gals..... Sitting near the water tank of the great college Charotar institute of technology, Changa (NO ..... its not a college in China ... but is in the peaceful state of Gujarat) .....

The "Pani ki Tanki"

Guys who addressed themselves as friends (won’t be adding adjectives like BEST friends or TRUE friends coz it’s not required)

I, the weirdest of them all 

was busy in my regular and the most desirous pass time ..... keeping my eyes bolted at the Girls' Hostel Building.

Girls hostel …. The territory undiscovered 

All of my concentration was shattered brutally by manja , the coolest and the most decent of us ... the server handling many clients ;) 

The server

He said ..... in fact started a philosophical satsang .... "yaar apne group ka naam hona chahiye" .....

Then started the list of the most lamest names like "fantastic 13" "superb 13" "terah badmaash" and all.....

One of Trupti, Anuja or Kintal .. The only girl percentage of the group

said ...

"Dude, the name should be something different”... As usual we rejected the whole idea ....

As soon as the girls intervened ... we started some other chats..... as usual  not to inovolve ourselves into a conversation with them :D :D :D

All of a sudden the philosophical side of Sagar (my partner in psycho-ism) 

partner in psycho-ism

woke up ….. “Don’t you think we all like rivers, have our own specialty, totally different from each other” … Me and Manja got inspired and said “and we met like a delta” ….. 

All the vocal cords simultaneous sang …… The name should be DELTA ….. And the rarest moment of all, We all agreed to a Thing without any debate :P

Then Sutta 

The Abla Mard

the ABLA MARD of the group said “what was the date when we all met” … 

LAMBI KHAMOSHI ….. It happened all the time when sutta said something :D ..... 

Out of the psycho philosophy came the greatest words of all time “no one knows ….. The DELTA is AT HORIZON ” …. 

I felt like rushing in that Girls' Hostel ...... holding the hottest girl tightly ...... reach very close to her ......... and scream at the top of my voice …… the name would be DELTA AT HORIZON …….

Man that was a hell of a day …..

And after almost 4 years I guess …… I was confused on the topic of My First Tattoo …… then got a slap from within ….. 

What could be better than the word which has defined the very Bhavik Sharma, the guy who was totally introvert and stubborn and a never-talking-to-stranger fellow ...... is now some how able to face the world ….. It has to be DELTA AT HORIZON …… The word changing me 180 degrees …

So it is now …… I have a tattoo defining my very self …… and this word doesn’t symbolize just a college group of those 13 guys and gals ….. It symbolizes friendship which we guys have earned in these years wherever we go …. Thanks to the ability of talking to people and understanding them which we got from this very group D@H……

Thanks a lot guys for friendship ….. I won’t list down the names of the people behind DELTA AT HORIZON ……. Coz we all know who all fall under this, and their importance …..

GodS Must Be CrazY

The nerd God expressing himself after E.V.O.L.U.T.I.O.N

As the greatest of all Mr Russell Peters say ..... I was enjoying my thinking-absolutely-nothing time.... All of a sudden got a bang.... I mean a Hit ... By a thought.... which resulted me to do a rarest and most excruciating task of all..... "Think" ...

I thought.... Gods might be students of some High tech, NASA type biology center (I know I know ..... NASA is NOT a biology centre ..... but NASA always adds up spices in an Ultra fiction story ....... ) when they created guys and girls.... Just drive your imagination beyond speed limits and do the task which you and I do the rarest .... 

A highly qualified young Goddess might be in her attempt to invent some incomparable thing.... To prove her pehla-nasha-pehla-khumaar for the lab instructor...... 

She might have mixed some dark, smelly, highly-active-in-dark chemicals and got the result as a stable, yet highly active at times, product tending to come out of the flask and flowing in a particular direction no matter where the flask was carried to (the strong point of the story).... The Goddess, highly impressed by her own self, named that formula as 

Mindlessly Eloping Nomads ...... given an Acronym as M.E.N. ..... Considering the fact that the product was Eloping to a particular direction.

The Goddess decided to create biological species out of this Formula .... which would prove to be the most powerful species of all time .... with no weakness ....and would be presenting the same in the Greatest competition of the universe ...... Extraordinarily Versatile Objective of Locating the Ultraprecise Trainee In Organic Nature ..... Popular by the Acronym E.V.O.L.U.T.I.O.N. conducted on Earth.... 

After months of hard work, finally the prototype was alive.... Exhibiting the characteristics of the core chemicals used to create the very formula..... The prototype was Dark, was smelly and would always be highly active and violent in Darkness as if searching for something. The Goddess named the prototype as Anatomical Design of Activated M.E.N. ....... A.D.A.M. 

She was so very sure to win the competition and she would be expressing her selfless love to the lab instructor.... She could even hear the Mohabbatein music at the back ground and the leaves flying randomly in strong wind currents ..... Winds which were ruthlessly blowing the leaves but were not able to move even a single strand of hair of the Goddess..... 

Lab instructor could be imagined with a violin and a sweater..... In scorching heat.... The sweater was I guess bolted on to his shoulders.... As it was, as it is on that place even though the Lab instructor was dancing madly to impress the young Goddess...... 

But as we say in India.... Har Din Diwali Nahi Hoti ..... Which means.... to Hell with the exact meaning.... The "lollypop" of the phrase is that you would be screwed in very near future ...... and for the young Goddess that near future was about to arrive..... 

FLASH BACK..... CUT TO THE SCENE WHERE M.E.N was invented..... 

Product tending to come out of the flask and flowing in a particular direction ...... following the camera to the direction where the formula M.E.N. was desperate to go..... 

What stood there was a nerd GOD..... Not talking to much people around ... and highly annoyed by this young Goddess who was gaining popularity on her so called awesome, but hopeless and pathetic formula M.E.N. .... what does she think of herself.... just wait and watch when my formula is ready to rock and roll..... 

The nerd GOD..... Unlike the young Goddess..... Searched the rarest chemicals from the lab and decided to craft the most bizarre mixture of all.....  He mixed chemicals which projected characteristics ranging from as strong as intelligence, self-dependent, bright to as shallow as stupidity, carelessness, ignorance, intolerance.

Characteristics of one chemical were in total contradiction with the other. If we go by the book, the formula created by such mixture would not survive and would explode, destroying all the things in close proximity. But the nerd God was a dude who created His ways in complete opposite directions than what was guided. And as all the popularity and attention was already gifted to the Goddess, He had nothing to lose.

So, the God, after folding His hands and praying to..... Wait a minute who would Gods pray to.... I mean Gods would have also been landed up in deep shit sometime..... Well come on.....  Gods created this whole thing ...... at some point They might have goofed up.... To whom Gods would be praying in such situation...... Like we humans do when we are caught doing some disgusting things (Now it’s the readers' responsibility to imagine the "disgusting thing" as per their level of disgust)

Anyways, the nerd God remembered His near and dear ones and mixed the chemicals....

K-BOOM!!!!! ....... Nothing happened ...... the chemicals miraculously complimented each other and surprisingly created a stable formula.....

Seeing such a drastic unexpected behavior of the formula and the desire to annihilate the formula M.E.N. ... the nerd named His formula......

Wreckful Operator for M.E.N. Elimination Norm.... W.O.M.E.N.

This Nerd God, Believe me, might be a hell of an intelligent guy..... He prepared the prototype in few hours itself...... The formula itself had the ability of self-creation seeing the things around..... Within hours the Prototype named Extreme Vicious Effigy ... E.V.E. came to life .....

The nerd God was too happy initially seeing the extremely fast growth of the prototype and in the intoxication of His achievement He too registered Himself in E.V.O.L.U.T.I.O.N. ..... But as He monitored the activities of the prototype closely...... He found that He is in the middle of pot full of slimy, yellowish ...... problem..... 

E.V.E. would not complete any assigned task. It would just stop doing the assigned task and would just start exhibiting strange characteristics, characteristics which were never studied by even the greatest Gods in the field of biology..... And in one situation, with given external conditions, on a particular self-state, the prototype behaved differently each time, not matching by a single percentage with the previous behavior.

As we say in Hindi, Nerd ka Dil Halak Ko Aa Gaya, again to Hell with the original meaning.... the "lollypop" is that the Nerd got screwed......

On the other side ....... all the Test Case Scenarios (I would dedicate this word to my colleagues of Testing Team working with me in the IT firm) performed on A.D.A.M. were giving 100% accurate results  ..... It was an ASS.... I mean an Accurate, Stable and Strong prototype.

The D Day .......

All the Old Long bearded Gods with their beautiful and half aged Goddess (why does these mythological daily soaps show all the Gods having so beautiful partner .... It leaves a mammoth negative impact on guys like us who are not able to get a girl even after 24 years of investment here on the holy earth) and their annoying little baby Gods gathered to a place, crowned with the honorary status of the Holiest place on earth, LAS VEGAS .........

A series of rigorous tasks were designed which all the prototypes have to complete..... Being isolated from other prototypes to avoid any unethical deed.....

A.D.A.M. as expected was performing all the tasks with 100% accuracy ..... He was also signed by the Gods as the First James Bond .....  and on the other hand E.V.E. always started the tasks with a positive note but as its characteristics, use to leave the task and exhibit alien behavior .....

A.D.A.M. made his way into the final as smoothly as a fart from the Ass.... leaving the smell towards E.V.E...... E.V.E. unexpectedly made it into finals ...... as hard as re-directing the fart to its place of origin..... But this task was made a bit simpler by the wide holed pathetic fellow competitors who performed even worse than E.V.E. .......

So it was A.D.A.M. versus E.V.E. in the final..... Almost half of the stands were empty.... pre judging the results..... and hoping to spend their evening at some Divine casino to conquer the quest to achieve the ultimate truth ... MONEY BABY MONEY :D  

The nerd googled "how to commit suicide" and had prepared a list already.... While the young Goddess was busy planning her wedding day with the lab instructor.....

(But a total Unforeseen fate of Earth and Mankind was to be written using this predictable and lifeless final game as the very foundation)

The final was a complex game.... and that too one on one.... The finalists would be given a topic and they need to do a Developmental and Expressive Beliefs on At-hand Topic Endowed.... 

D.E.B.A.T.E. ...... the finalist who scores 10 points out of the 2 wins..... 

Bingo for the young Goddess .... This game was the favorite pass time of Her prototype A.D.A.M. ..... It was a piece of cake now.... Now the only tough task for A.D.A.M. was to decide a dashing signature to sign the James Bond movie contract ..... Screws for the poor nerd God.... This game was new to him as well ....... can't expect nothing from E.V.E. .... By this time He had decided the Top 5 ways to commit suicide...... 

He was just praying.... don't know to whom ... again.... that this time E.V.E. exhibits a unexpected but favorable character ..... 

The D.E.B.A.T.E. started ...... one statement from A.D.A.M. ... nothing from E.V.E. .... scores 1/0.... Second statement from A.D.A.M. ..... Total absurd and mindless statement from E.V.E. .... scores 2/0 ..... Within 10 minutes A.D.A.M. 9 and E.V.E. 0..... The nerd was all set ... standing on a stool with rope around His neck..... All of a sudden E.V.E. started showing a character which was never thought of ...... 

She started CRYING..... And said some pathetic thing.... Now this NEGATIVE TEST CASE SCENARIO (again thanks to my colleagues in Testing team for this word) A.D.A.M.  was not trained by the Goddess..... A.D.A.M. said "I agree with E.V.E." .... score 9/1 ... again a hopeless statement by the sobbing E.V.E. .... A.D.A.M. ... "I agree" ... score 9/2......

History was written in the next 5 minutes ... Scores .... A.D.A.M. 9 ... E.V.E. 10 ..... E.V.E. WON ..... 

The nerd God WON ..... All of a sudden He was the Star .... The Hunk …. hotter for girls than Angelina Jolie is for boys ....

He decided to stay here on the holy land of LAS VEGAS and decided to develop a large scale laboratory near by and would exponentially increase his work on W.O.M.E.N. .... Now you know the History and mythology behind HOLLYWOOD...... 

The nerd ordered E.V.E. to go with his new lover A.D.A.M. to the far end of earth and establish a same kind of lab to mark His world supremacy..... Secretly the lab instructor followed EVE as mann hi mann wo E.V.E. se pyaar karne laga tha ... sorry for my Hindi-speaking-self coming out.... I mean the lab instructor was secretly in love with E.V.E. .... Now you know the History and mythology behind BOLLYWOOD and the oldest love triangle theory..... 

The young Goddess.... well she went into the darker side of life and re-engineered Her Product to design prototype to destroy the every earth.... and NOW you know the history and mythology behind the creation of guys like Osama Bin Laden .....